I didn’t know people with children let alone people with babies. This went on for years. It’s a cocktail for disaster.
Being a stay at home mom can be extremely lonely. Believe me, I know. When my first son was born, I was working out of the house on our family business, while his father traveled for work. I was 24, a bit of an introvert, living in Los Angeles, with a little one on my hip. I had minimal interaction with other people; most of which was by phone with a dear friend we call an auntee, my mom and an acting class I went to once a week (yes, you’ll find many actors are introverts).
I got super reclusive and depressed which led to more reclusivity. I didn’t know people with children let alone people with babies. This went on for years. It’s a cocktail for disaster. My best friend was my baby. My entertainment: my baby. My mission in life… my security… my baby. Not healthy. Not healthy for me. Not healthy for him. Not healthy for my marriage. Not healthy for a wanna be actor. No one told me about mommy groups, we didn’t have the internet the way we do now and in truth I didn’t know any better. In my simple, young mind, this was my life now.
It wasn’t until my son started going to pre-school that I truly started making friends on terms that were solely based on enjoying being with each other and not work related. It was when he was in kindergarten in NY, that we finally really hit our stride. To this day, my dear friend Robin, another mom I met in the halls of PS 9, doesn’t know how much she pulled me out of my shell.
Almost a decade later, my second son was born. Still a bit of an introvert and back in Los Angeles, I was bound and determined to do things differently. I forced myself to make coffee dates, we checked out all of the local activities, I joined mommy play groups, and finally even created one of my own!
Get online and find groups to join! They are everywhere today. Use Facebook and mom blogs. When your child is at an age when she’s going to school, volunteer to help out. Join women doing things you believe in. Ha! I’ll even give an unabashed plug! Write something on parenting for . Tell us about the groups you find! Talk about the issues you have. We’re in this together! We as women have the tools to empower each other. Don’t do this alone! Congratulations on your growing family!